Ordained Pastor · Grief Recovery Facilitator · Bible Teacher
Hi, I'm Pastor Howard.
Welcome. There is hope for the road ahead, and you don't have to walk it alone.
For more than 45 years I've walked beside people through some of life's most difficult seasons. As an ordained pastor and Bible teacher, I've sat with families in hospital rooms, funeral homes, gravesides, and living rooms, and in the quiet moments when grief feels most overwhelming.
For more than 15 years I've led grief recovery groups for anyone grieving the loss of someone they love. Along the way I've walked with hundreds of grieving people. Most of them weren't looking for a program. They were looking for someone willing to stay in the room when the easy answers ran out. That's what I try to be.
Those years taught me something. Many people suffer longer than they need to. Not because they're grieving the wrong way, but because no one gave them practical guidance, honest encouragement, and permission to grieve.
That's why everything here brings together three trusted sources of wisdom. I believe they work best together.
Our approach
Scripture, Honestly Applied
Not platitudes. Real passages from the Bible, carefully and honestly applied to what you are actually feeling right now. Scripture gives honest words for sorrow, the nearness of God when He feels far away, and a hope that speaks to the spiritual part of you. Lament is welcome here. Doubt gets room here. The Bible meets you where you are, not where someone thinks you should be.
Proven Grief Counseling Wisdom
Decades of time proven wisdom from grief counselors and support groups, brought into plain language. What they have learned about loss, identity, and healing, turned into small, doable steps you can take this week, right where you are. Never cold. Never academic.
The Science of Loss
What your brain is doing right now, and how your body is responding in very real ways. Research that explains the grief fog, the exhaustion, the sleepless nights, and the other ways loss shows up in your everyday life. When you understand why you feel this way, you can stop judging yourself and start caring for yourself. Always in warm, everyday language.
I'm not a counselor, and I'll never pretend to be one. I'm a pastor who knows grief and knows Jesus. When someone needs more help than I can give, I'm the first to point them to a good grief counselor or doctor.
Why My Grief Matters exists
Most of us were never taught how to grieve. Then someone we love dies, and we're expected to know what to do.
My Grief Matters is here for anyone who has lost someone they love. A spouse, a parent, a child, a brother or sister, a friend. You'll find honest answers to the questions grief brings, grounded in Scripture and in proven grief wisdom. No platitudes. No rushing. No pressure.
Whether you follow Jesus, come from another faith tradition, or have never thought much about faith at all, you're welcome here.
If you've lost your husband, I also lead Grieving Widows Matter, a ministry written especially for widows.
A little more about me
I'm also a businessman. I spent nearly 25 years building a landscape company from the ground up. That taught me a lot about hard work, real problems, and showing up when it would be easier not to.
My wife Carris and I have been married for 47 years. We have three children and four grandchildren, and we live in Meridian, Idaho. I still believe the best conversations happen over a cup of coffee.
Where to start
If you're not sure where to begin, start with 15 questions people ask about grief. Or browse all the articles.
Whatever brought you here, you don't have to walk this road alone.
Blessings,
Pastor Howard